Dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
Q: Why does Chuck sleep in the light?!
A: Because the dark is afraid of Chuck!
Q: Why does Chuck sleep in the light?!
A: Because the dark is afraid of Chuck!
A man and his wife entered a dentist’s office. The wife said, “I want a tooth pulled. I don’t want gas or Novocain because I’m in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible.”
“You’re a brave woman,” said the dentist. “Now, show me which tooth it is.”
The wife turns to her husband and says: “Open your mouth and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear.”
Biker almost drived into a beautiful lady. She says:
- Couldn’t you call me next time?
- Of course, just tell me your phone number.
Mountain skier training courses consists of three chapters: to learn how to put on skies, to lear how to land from the mountain, and to learn how to walk with crutch.
Barber is shaving a client and cuts his skin the third time. Client can’t perish anymore and shouts:
- Please give me a shaver, too. I want to defend myself.
In one busy street in Paris two Santa Clauses meet each other. One says:
- Do you still believe in kids?
Train stops at the station somwhere in a middle of the United Kingdom. Passenger is asking the conductor:
- How long are we going to wait?
- From two to two, to two two (from 1:58 to 2:02)
One day drummer became too tired for all that teasing he was getting. He decided to learn to play with the real musical instrument so he got himself to musical store. Took a look around and told to saleswoman:
- I want that red trumpet and this accordion.
- Hmmmm, - okay, you can take the extinguisher but please leave the heater there it is.
One lonely passenger is driving by bus. Suddenly armed brigand gets in and shouts:
- Money!!!
- I don’t have even a sinlge penny!
- So why are you so scary then?
- I thought it was a controller.
Peter returns from school. His mother asks:
- Peter, what did father told you then you came back after party at 3:00 o’clock yeterday?
- Say it without swear-words?
- Sure!
- Nothing, then.